Strange Wilderness

"You're shitting me!
You know Bigfoot's name?"

1 Star

You can tell this movie was made just to pay the bills, without working too hard to do it.
Might be pretty funny if you were 10, and had no cable and someone left it at your house.

This ragtag group of guys produce a nature show that airs at 3 in the morning. With the threat of being canceled they need something big to save their show. With a tip from an old friend they decide to hunt Bigfoot. The plot is simple enough, so there's plenty of room for cheap cheap cheap 99cent bits. Including pot jokes, dick jokes, drug jokes, and other jokes that are painfully obvious!! (Hey check it out, I smoked a shit load of weed and nitrous, and I drew a dick on the bus!) Yawn....
They really tried to push the bit that they run a nature show, but swear throughout it on the voice overs.
"This bear is the largest fuckin animal in the forest. He eats a shitload of salmon a day..."
They really beat you over the head with that one, geesh!

The two actors who actually have great comedic talent were totally butchered!
Jonha Hill (Superbad) could have easily held this movie on his own, but instead he had a third tier roll with an accent (?) that I couldn't even discern where they wanted him to be from. Made no sense. Then, there's Peter Dante (part of the Sandler troupe) who can make anything he says funny, and they kill him off in the first 15 minutes!!!
Wow. They just really wanted this movie to fail.
I'm all about the sick humor! Dick jokes? Love 'em! Stoners? Ya! F-bombs? I'm in!
But there is some sort of style, and talent that can make these elements hilarious...
this movie ditched class that day.

Fellon

"We're all in prison."

3.5 Stars

Well, first of all... prison is no place TO BE!!

My mom had this movie and it didn't look too bad.  She knows I like prison movies so I was in.

Interesting premiss.  Porter (Stephen Dorff) is a hard working new father, and starting his own construction business. A burglar enters the house and after making sure his family is in one spot he grabs his baseball bat and searches the house.  The robber bolts and as he's running out Porter throws a fatal and the bad guy is dead on his lawn.

Now here's the most discussed part of this movie for us.  Because he was killed outside of the house, Porter is now placed under arrest and charged with murder.  Apparently this is knowledge my Grandfather knew already.  

"Drag 'em into the house." he said, according to my mom.  Leave it to Grandpa to know the loop holes.

Porter's prison experience quickly turns for the worst and he is soon placed in a max security prison, "The Shoe".  It all happens so fast and you can't help but feel so bad for this guy who was only protecting his family.  

The prison has a sort of "fight club" that the guards bet on and enjoy watching.  Porter learns to hold his own, and survive.  

Val Kilmer, who can easily be mistaken for Jeff Bridges in this, is his cellmate.  He's got his own story, and I appreciate that their relationship wasn't so predictable.

The women in this movie were very miscast. I'm confident that's what cheapened this movie.

There was a poor man's Mary Steenburgen as his mother-in-law, and the wife was very unsympathetic.

But there were about... two "oh shit!" moments and that's a good thing.

Lessons learned?  

• Don't go to jail.
• Drag 'em into the house!
• And pay up, and get Mary Steenburgen.